


Strictly Professional

by ArgentLives



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Pining, Workplace Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-05-06 18:05:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5426570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArgentLives/pseuds/ArgentLives
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Iris needs a little help getting her new boss to back off, and Linda is more than happy to offer her services. All in the name of professionalism, of course. Iris just wants to keep her job...(and maybe keep Linda, too).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strictly Professional

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Day 1 of Flarrow Femslash Week (Fake/Pretend Relationship AU) because there was no way I was gonna pass up the excuse to write fake dating

Iris watched her new boss go with a growing sense of dread in the pit of her stomach, slumping back in her chair and resisting the urge to bury her face in her arms. And never resurface. Because fuck. _Fuck._ This couldn’t be happening. _Why was this happening to her?_

“Well, well, well,” Linda whistled, coming over to perch herself at the edge of Iris’s desk, the very place that Mr. Evans had just vacated. (‘ _Please, Ms. West, just call me Scott_ ,’ he’d said with a flirtatious little wink that he’d clearly thought looked sexy. Iris wanted to gag at the memory). At least with Linda she didn’t feel the urge to shove her off. “Looks like someone’s got the hots for you, West.”

“Jesus fuck, Linda. Just. I don’t know. Kill me now, please,” Iris groaned, and this time she did bury her face into her hands, like if she could just block out the world around her she could pretend this problem simply…didn’t exist. Except that her hands still smelled like the peppermint lotion Mr. Evans had been wearing, the scent clinging to her skin from when he’d shook her hand, reminding her that her problem wasn’t going anywhere. And the proof was right there in front of her, in the stupid peppermint smell that was starting to make her head spin.

“Hmm,” Linda clucked her tongue, reaching out with warm hands to pry Iris’s away from her face. Instead of dropping them, she held them in her own, rubbing soothing circles into her palms to ease some of the tension. Iris didn’t fight it, relaxing into her touch, letting herself breathe and just appreciate the contact. “See, I would…but the thing is, I actually _like_ having you around. Maybe you could hit up my evil meta-human twin, though. I’m sure she’s still out there and willing, somewhere.”

“I’m _serious_ , Linda,” Iris pouted, sneaking a glance at _Mr. Evans_. Not Scott, nope. Absolutely not Scott. She refused to call him by his first name. That would imply that, you know, they were actually friends. And that he wasn’t her fucking _boss_. As though sensing her gaze, he looked over and caught her eye. She looked away hastily, but not fast enough to miss the self-satisfied little smirk he sent her way, the grin that told her he’d clearly misinterpreted her staring for actual interest. _Ugh._ “I’m so screwed.”

“Why? He’s not _that_ bad,” Linda said thoughtfully, eyeing him up and down from where he stood at the other end of the building, lounging against the wall and apparently in deep discussion with another co-worker. Iris scowled at the appreciative glint in Linda’s eyes, a surge of annoyance making her wriggle her hands away from Linda’s grip.

“Please, I am _so_ not interested in having a thing with my boss. Do you know how ugly that could get? I mean, I’m also not really interested in having a thing with him, period, but, you know. The boss thing certainly doesn’t help.”

“Okay,” Linda said slowly, giving her a funny look, “so just…tell him you’re not interested? Let him down gently, I don’t know. I don’t really see what the big deal is.”

Iris let out an exaggerated sigh, letting her head fall back against her chair with a loud ‘thump.’ “That’s the thing, though. I _can’t_. I don’t have enough of a feel for him yet, you know? I don’t know what kind of person he is. What if he’s the type of guy who’ll hold a grudge against me if I turn him down? What if it affects my job? But then I still have to say _something_ , because I kind of need him to stop hitting on me while I’m trying to get my work done. Either way, I’m screwed.”

Linda bit her lip, finally catching onto her dilemma. “You could…well, no, that wouldn’t work, but maybe you could…oh! I got it,” she snapped her fingers together, leaning in closer to deliver the pitch, her eyes sparkling with satisfaction. “Just say you’re already seeing someone. That always works, right?”

“But…” Iris frowned, straightening up a bit as she mulled the idea over. “I’m...not?”

“Well, duh,” Linda rolled her eyes, “I swear, Iris, you’re almost _too_ honest sometimes. You don’t have to actually be in a relationship. Evans won’t know any better. You _pretend_.”

 _Oh,_ Iris thought,the wheels turningin her head.That was—actually not a terrible idea. And yet, she got caught in a lie, it definitely could be. “I don’t know…I mean, what if he finds out I’m lying? Wouldn’t that be even worse? Then he’d know I was only making it up because I didn’t want anything to do with him.”

“Well, to be fair, you don’t,” Linda shrugged, tearing off a piece of the leftover cronut on Iris’s desk and tossing it in her mouth, “And it’s really none of his business anyway. But, if you’re really that concerned, I could help you really sell it. Make it believable, you know.”

“How?”

“You, um, you could,” Linda swallowed with difficulty, and Iris wondered briefly if the cronut hadn’t agreed with her. She couldn’t imagine why else her friend would look so flustered. “You could say you’re dating someone specific, like. Me, I mean, like me. We, uh. We could pretend to date. You and me. The two of us. Girlfriends. Um, so—”

“That way I’d have solid evidence,” Iris perked up, quickly catching on and finishing the thought for her. “Oh, man, Linda—you’re a genius. The proof would be right in front of his face. We could totally get handsy while working or something. Now _that’s_ an idea.”

“My thoughts exactly,” Linda grinned at her, but there was something strained in her smile that Iris couldn’t quite figure out. It had been her idea, after all. She shrugged it off, a million thoughts already flying through her head.

“Okay, so, we should probably plan—”

“Iris.”

“—how this is going to work, like, what our story is and how we’re going to make this work and—”

“Iris.”

“—what this is going to play out like and—”

“ _Iris!_ I get that you’re on a roll here but—”

“What?” Iris blinked at her, confused at the (okay, not so sudden) intrusion. Because she _was_ on a roll. And she liked to plan, which clearly Linda was having none of.

“Look,” Linda sucked in a deep breath, skootching closer on the desk and angling her legs so that they were brushing up against Iris’s. If she were to hop off the desk, she’d probably be sitting right in Iris’s lap. Iris tried not to think about why that thought made her stomach flutter. “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your boy is heading this way right now.”

Linda gave a slight tilt of her head towards the other end of the room, raising her eyebrows in warning. Iris followed her gaze, and sure enough, Evans had apparently wrapped up his previous conversation and was approaching Iris’s desk with purpose in his stride, checking out his reflection in the screen of his phone. Iris turned back to Linda with a panicked expression, fully prepared for her to share it, but was momentarily taken aback by the determined glint in her friend’s eyes.

“Put your hand on my knee,” Linda whispered, nudging Iris’s leg with her own.

“Wait, now? We’re starting this _now_?”

“I mean, yeah, might as well. Better shake him sooner rather than later, right?”

Iris opened her mouth to argue, but snapped it shut again as the footsteps got closer, signaling her approaching doom. Linda was here, and willing, and yeah—sooner was definitely better than later. Planning be damned. Hesitantly, she placed her hand over Linda’s knee, squeezing it a little because—okay, just because. Linda’s skirt was a little shorter than usual and she had obviously shaved recently, and her legs were _soft_. She threw Linda a questioning look, a silent _is this okay?_ , and Linda nodded approvingly.

“Okay, good, now open your mouth.”

“ _What_?”

“Just do it,” Linda hissed, quickly tearing off another piece of cronut. Iris decided not to mention that it was actually left over from the day before, and probably stale, because Linda obviously hadn’t seemed to notice earlier. Mildly concerned with whatever she was planning, Iris followed her instructions, nearly choking as Linda leaned forward and plopped the cronut right into Iris’s waiting mouth, letting her fingers linger there as Iris stared at her with wide eyes. “Now close, and swallow,” Linda prompted, her fingers _still in Iris’s mouth_ , finally pulling them out with a ‘pop’ that sent shivers down Iris’s spine as she closed her mouth around them. She swallowed mechanically, sure her brain must be short-circuiting as she watched Linda bring her fingers back to her own mouth to _lick_ them. _Jesus Christ_.

“How did that taste, babe?” Linda asked, looking far more relaxed than Iris felt, but there was a flush to her skin that hadn’t been there before, so maybe Iris wasn’t alone in this, after all.

“Delicious,” Iris said thickly, and it wasn’t a lie, really, because cronuts always tasted good—stale or not, one day old or five. But it was more the taste of Linda’s fingers in her mouth that she couldn’t quite shake, her lips around Linda’s skin, so smooth and delicious in a way that had nothing to do with food. “You want a taste? You can have the rest,” she gestured to the sad remnants of cronut on her desk, but Linda just shook her head and leaned in closer, making Iris’s breath hitch in her chest.

“Mmm, thanks for the offer, but I think I’d rather just…”

Iris saw it coming as Linda leaned in even closer, but that didn’t stop her heart from feeling like it was about to leap out of her chest. _It’s just for show,_ she told herself, steeling her nerves _, it doesn’t have to mean anything._ She gave the slightest nod of her head at Linda’s brief hesitation, her gaze dropping down to Iris’s lips and then back up to meet her eyes with her face only inches away. Iris gripped the sides of her chair and swallowed hard, communicating a wide-eyed _‘do it_ ,’ and before she could even form another thought Linda’s lips were on hers.

Suddenly the prospect of thinking coherently at all seemed miles away, Linda’s lips so soft and warm and sweet, and oh— _oh_. That was tongue. That was definitely tongue. Sweeping in her mouth with expert precision and then running along her bottom lip before pulling away, and it was so, so good. Iris almost whined when Linda broke the kiss, resisting the urge to pull her right back in.

“You had some icing on your lip,” Linda said, breathless, her hand still cupping Iris’s cheek. Iris found that she couldn’t look away, with Linda looking at her like that, her gaze heavy and curious like she was searching for something. “Don’t worry though, I got it. And you were right—that did taste delicious.”

It wasn’t until someone cleared their throat loudly next to them that they jumped apart, but instead of moving away completely Linda merely dropped her hand from Iris’s face to her leg, refusing to break contact between them. _Good_ , Iris thought to herself, letting out a little sigh of content as Linda traced little patterns against her skin. _That’s really good—for, uh, pretend purposes, of course!_

“What’s going on here, ladies?” Scott—Mr. Evans—scowled, looking back and forth between the two of them with a decidedly put-out expression. Iris wondered how long he’d been standing there, because honestly, if he hadn’t announced his presence, she wouldn’t have even noticed. Her heart was still thundering against her ribcage, her lips tingling with the ghost of Linda’s kiss lingering on them, her mind a jumbled mess of want and confusion. She’d honestly almost forgotten what they’d been kissing for, she’d been so caught up in how nice it had been, but now that the fog was clearing from her mind, as she tore her gaze away from Linda’s and blinked stupidly at her boss, it was obvious that it had served its purpose. _So…success?_

“Oh, sorry, Mr. Evans,” Iris said, catching her breath and watching his scowl deepen at the use of his last name. Linda moved her hand to crawl up Iris’s thigh, slow and deliberate, enough to make her breath catch in her throat. Iris swatted it away half-heartedly, the heat rushing to her face at the thought of people watching. Linda apparently _really_ wanted to push their luck. “My _girlfriend_ doesn’t know how to keep her hands to herself, apparently.”

“Girlfriend?”

“Yeah, Linda and I—we’ve been together for, uh, for—”

“Six months,” Linda lied easily, and Iris let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, content to let Linda take the reins on this one. “It’s kind of a funny story, how we met, actually, but I won’t bore you with the details. Long story short, this girl has been the best thing to happen to happen to me in a long time.”

Mr. Evans grunted, clearly unimpressed by the sappy smile Linda was directing at Iris, which was a shame, really, because Iris found it _really_ impressive. “This is a professional establishment, ladies. I expect you to keep things professional.” Iris had to hold back a snort at that. _Yeah, right, you big hypocrite_ , she thought, opting instead to exchange a knowing glance with Linda—only to remember what they’d been doing just moments ago, why Linda’s lips still looked so wet, how they felt against hers. _Fuck._ “You two are at work right now—save…whatever it is you were doing…for your personal time.”

“Right,” Iris nodded, silently cheering at the fact that their ploy had apparently worked, “Of course. We’re usually not this bad. It’s just a special—”

Mr. Evans held a hand up, silencing her. “You really don’t need to share with me, _Ms. West_. Now get back to work, you two.”

“Aye-aye, captain,” Linda muttered under her breath as their boss turned on his heel and stalked away, snickering when Iris kicked her under the desk. “So. I think it worked.”

“Yeah,” Iris breathed, finding her gaze drawn back to Linda’s lips, still wet and red and looking thoroughly kissed. And certainly like they use some more. “Listen…Linda, I—look. That was—God, I don’t know, just get coffee with me after work. Please? Or dinner. Or something. Let’s just—do you want to go on a date? A real date? Because that was—it’s just that I _really_ —”

“Relax, Iris,” Linda laughed, leaning in to kiss her again, professionalism be damned. She pulled back just enough for Iris to see her smirk, and she got the feeling that maybe Linda was a better planner than she’d thought. Which, all things considered, she certainly wasn’t complaining. “I thought you’d never ask.”


End file.
